A 28-year-old woman shared what happened after she received a call from the hospital informing her that her mother needed a liver transplant. She posted her story on Reddit’s “raisedbynarcissists” forum, hoping other people would understand her feelings.
The woman did not share a good bond with her mother all her life. She revealed that her mother mistreated her and her siblings and never showed them love or cared for them like other parents. The children grew up knowing their mother resented them.
Hoping to live a peaceful and sane life away from her mother, the Redditor moved out at 17. Instead of working a regular job and doing what everyone did, the woman bought a cabin in a remote area and landed a job that allowed her to work from home. Her current lifestyle was what she had always dreamt of.
It was a regular day for the woman when she received a call from a hospital telling her that her mother needed a liver transplant. When the doctors tested her and her siblings’ blood samples, it turned out that all three kids were a match. However, not everyone was willing to be a donor.
What Happened after the Woman Learned about Her Mother’s Condition?
After learning about the risks associated with being a liver donor, the woman’s sister and brother decided not to proceed. “My sister is married and has two kids. My brother is divorced with 3 kids,” the woman revealed.
Meanwhile, the woman was at a higher risk of death and health complications because she had situs inversus, a condition where the body organs are positioned abnormally. She added:
“And, of course, a 100% guarantee that my mother will drink that liver away, too.”
Despite knowing she was at a higher risk of complications, her siblings, mother, and the doctor asked her to be the donor because she was the only sibling with no kids. This made the woman angry. She felt undervalued just because she chose not to have children.
The woman felt her family did not value her life choices, while she was content living the life she had always wanted. Moreover, hearing the doctor telling her that the risks associated with her surgery did not matter angered her even more. He wanted her to be the donor because she didn’t have kids to look after.
Meanwhile, her mother said, “I gave you life, you should do the same for me, after all I gave you my best years, raising you was no joke!”
The woman felt her mother had no right to ask her to be a donor, considering how awful a mother she was. She recalled a painful moment from her childhood when her mother locked her out of the house on a freezing day. She recounted breaking the window glass with her hand to enter the house.
Considering the 17 years of abuse and pain she had endured from her mother, the woman decided not to donate her liver. She told other Redditors she would take a train back home the following day and planned not to answer any calls from the hospital.
What Did Other Users Think about the Incident?
After reading the woman’s detailed post, other Redditors expressed their opinions in the comments section. One user advised her to “think about herself” instead of going under the knife for her mother.
Meanwhile, another user was shocked to learn what the doctor said. “How outrageous for that doctor to suggest that your life has any less value than your siblings just because you don’t have children,” the user wrote.
The user added that the woman did not owe anything to her mother because of all the abuse she had endured as a child. Another Redditor supported the woman, saying she should enjoy life instead of risking her health for her mother. The user said:
“I can’t believe the selfishness of your mother, who wants to risk ending your life at 28.”
Do you think the woman did the right thing by deciding not to be a liver donor for her mother? What would you have done if you were in her shoes?