AITA for telling my stepdaughter she’s absolutely under no circumstances allowed to switch out my cats food for vegan food even though she’s losing weight because the sight of normal cat food makes her sick?

A Reddit user recounted a dispute involving their stepdaughter, who has grown more and more dissatisfied with the home’s running, particularly where their cat, Mango, is concerned. Mango consumes a diet of meat, which is making the stepdaughter feel unwell, resulting in weight loss.

The stepdaughter is pushing for the cat’s diet to be exclusively vegan, a change the original poster and her spouse are resisting, asserting that Mango’s well-being and food choices are not up for debate. This disagreement has intensified, leading the stepdaughter to seek support from her grandmother. Is the original poster justified in maintaining their stance on the cat’s diet, or are they failing to recognize the stepdaughter’s concerns?

‘ AITA for telling my stepdaughter she’s absolutely under no circumstances allowed to switch out my cats food for vegan food even though she’s losing weight because the sight of normal cat food makes her sick?’

I apologize for the poor title. My stepdaughter will be residing with my spouse and myself for the upcoming year. She’s a knowledgeable young worker who’s putting aside money to acquire her own place. Ever since she started living with us (over the last three months), she’s grown progressively irritable and critical of my husband and my lifestyle.

Our environmental awareness is lacking since we fail to compost. We are careless in leaving lights on for safety when we’re away. We ought to adopt electric vehicles and our dairy consumption supports the cruel treatment of cattle. The issues go on and on.

TheCheesecakeOfDoom:
My cat, Mango, is aging and has enjoyed a life of eating whatever he wants (within safe limits for cats), which makes him happy. My stepdaughter now wants to buy vegan cat food because she feels disgusted seeing Mango eat meat.

User:mycatisbatshit

We give him his meals in the kitchen, but if she sees him consuming meat, she will gag, vomit, or simply exit the room. She has actually shed quite a few pounds since asserting that witnessing Mango eat meat makes her feel nauseous, and the dry biscuits we leave out for him to munch on also trigger her nausea. It’s not as though we leave a mess, but even if she detects the scent of his food in the morning (which is unpleasant, yes, but a reality of pet ownership), she will retch and leave.

Both her father and I have communicated to her that if she’s dissatisfied with the situation, she needs to seek alternative living arrangements. Despite our sincere sympathy for her loss of appetite and subsequent weight loss, we remain firm in our decision not to alter Mango’s established way of life. She has resorted to yelling, cursing, crying, pleading, and other tactics, but our stance remains unchanged: we are NOT in favor of Mango adhering to a vegan diet.

We provide him with high-quality cat food that is not heavily processed, sugary, or grain-filled. It’s essentially top-tier, gourmet-level food. My mother-in-law has intervened after my stepdaughter told her that we were being unjust by not allowing Mango to eat her chosen food, and is now claiming that we are cruel and lack foresight. She argues that we are causing her to become ill and that Mango will not be harmed by a dietary change, but my stepdaughter is suffering.

Here’s what the community had to contribute:

PaigeS91 −  NTA.
Veterinary nurse here. As explained above, cats are obligate carnivores, they absolutely need the taurine that only meat can provide. Cats cant thrive on a vegan diet. My mom is a pretty hardcore vegan and still feeds all her pets a species appropriate diet because she aware that’s what they need to be the healthiest they can be.

CarmineFields −  NTA Cats are obligate carnivores and they will sicken and die without meat.

Elli_Khoraz −  NTA. Pets can, and have, died whe irresponsible owners force their dietary beliefs on them.
Cats aren’t made to be vegan. She is being unreasonable, plus it’s your house – she shouldn’t be making all these demands on you at all.

Ermithecow −  NTA.
Cats cannot under any circumstances be vegan. They need meat. I have a vegan friends who still feed their cats meat because it’s their choice to be vegan, not the cats who couldn’t be even if he was sentient enough to want to be.
If she cares about animals and the environment so much, why would she want to actually harm a cat by feeding it unsuitable food? Why does she have to be in the room while the cat is eating his meat? Cat meat smells gross sure and that’s probably worse for a vegan. But she doesn’t have to watch the cat eat.

JeepersCreepers74 −  NTA. I was vegan for a while and know many vegans and all are able to be in a room while other people or animals are eating meat–it’s nearly impossible to live a life in vegan isolation. Plus, if she gets sick just seeing Mango eat a dry biscuit, is buying vegan cat food really going to solve the problem?
This is pure speculation without more information, but is it possible your stepdaughter has some mental/emotional issues (an eating disorder, OCD) that are causing her to get sick and lose weight and that she is blaming on the cat? Or is it possible she is hoping her dad or grandmother will take pity on her and put a down payment on that new house before she can afford it herself?

CorrectSherbet5 −  NTA. This chick is the reason people hate Vegans

PretentiousUsername1 −  Throw the whole stepdaugher out. NTA.

alittlegirllost −  You’re stepdaughter: “Im so vegan, I vomit at the sight of animal cruelty”
Also your stepdaughter: “Please perform animal cruelty on your pet for my personal comfort”
My kitty gets fed mostly a diet of pig hearts, which I buy whole and chop for her in my kitchen, if you feel like being really passive aggressive and having a super healthy cat.

[Reddit User] −  It sounds like your stepdaughter has an eating disorder and is using the cat’s food/her own vegan diet as an excuse. It’s hard to convince someone to change but you should be aware this might be happening.
NTA, of course you can’t put a cat on a vegan diet.

[Reddit User] −  NTA. Cats are obligate carnivores. That means they don’t have a choice when it comes to eating meat. Your husband needs to tell your stepdaughter this isn’t up for discussion any longer. (And maybe get her to a doctor, because if she can’t deal with even the slightest exposure to meat, she’s going to have a rough time of it.)

Was the Redditor right to not alter Mango’s food, or should they have given greater weight to the stepdaughter’s emotional and physical issues? What would be your approach in a comparable scenario involving family members with clashing beliefs? Post your opinions in the comments!