AITA for kicking my cousin off of my sister’s wedding Zoom call?

A brother was in charge of managing his sister’s virtual wedding on Zoom. Attendees were instructed to keep their microphones off, except for specific moments, to protect the couple’s special day. When the time came to unmute, the man’s cousin tried to propose to his significant other, possibly taking away from the wedding’s importance.

The host swiftly removed him from the virtual gathering under the pretense of “technical issues” to ensure the bride and groom remained the center of attention. This action has enraged the cousin and his family, who feel the special occasion was irreparably damaged. To learn more about this explosive disruption of the Zoom wedding, keep reading…

‘ AITA for kicking my cousin off of my sister’s wedding Zoom call?’

My older sister [30F] and her fiancé [31M] (I am [27M]) had been preparing for their wedding for over a year, with the date set for this month. Clearly, they cannot proceed with the wedding as they had intended. However, they still wish to get married, and have chosen to have a “Zoom” wedding instead, where family and friends can video call in to witness the officiant, my sister, and her fiancé.

My sister felt that organizing the Zoom meeting would overwhelm her, so she asked me to handle it, which I was happy to do. She and her fiancé chose to include everyone on their initial guest list, resulting in a very extensive invitation.

My sister told me while we were reviewing the arrangements that she prefers everyone else to be on mute for most of the wedding. She’s concerned that others might interrupt her and her fiancé and, in her words, “overshadow” them on their already smaller wedding day.

However, she and her fiancé suggested I temporarily unmute everyone so they could chat and enjoy themselves. On the wedding day, everyone was muted during the ceremony, and it went off without a hitch.

sublimosa: As a result, I unmute all participants and request that they virtually raise their hands if they wish to speak to avoid chaos. My cousin, who is about my age, begins to wave his hand frantically. He is accompanied by his longtime girlfriend, who is also around the same age, I presume. Given his outgoing personality, I was not taken aback.

He proceeds to make statements such as, “My sister and her husband are truly inspiring, they’ve given me the bravery to do this…”, then directs his attention to his girlfriend and produces a box roughly the dimensions of a ring box. I instantly interpreted this as a blatant attempt to divert attention to himself, a pattern of behavior I’ve observed since childhood.

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He would subtly ruin the drawings my sister and I made if the adults complimented ours, so I kicked him off the call. I then promptly stated that my cousin was having technical problems and would not be rejoining. Everyone else, including my sister and her husband, believed this and continued talking.

The wedding proceeded without further incident, save for the barrage of angry texts from my cousin, who claimed I’d spoiled his surprise proposal plan by getting engaged first. My aunt and uncle echoed his sentiments via text. Am I the bad guy?

Here’s the comments of Reddit users:

drseussgrandchild −  NTA!!! THANK GOD YOU DID THAT! Your cousin has issues, who would propose at another persons wedding? that’s the definition of overshadowing that your sis didn’t want. If I were your sister, I wouldn’t even know how to thank you.

[Reddit User] −  Nta Good on you for looking out for your sister. Your cousin is an attention*ore that deserved to be kicked out. So INAPPROPRIATE to take away from your sisters big day, ESPCIALLY since it’s already small since a pandemic. Despicable. Your cousin needs to grow up.

poodle_kitten −  NTA. That was probably the best unintended outcome of the wedding being virtual! Imagine if it had been in person – you’d have had to tackle his dumb ass, lol. Good for you!! I’m sure it’s annoying that you have to deal with his texts and those of his obviously biased parents.

Be grateful you’re not the one asking “Am I the a**hole for letting my cousin propose during my sister’s wedding?” on this platform.

tallclaimswizard −  NTA People who propose, make baby announcements, wear white dresses, or do other things that pull focus from the wedding couple are assholes.

unsurehowtoreddit −  NTA. It wasn’t his moment. You made a judgment call as moderator. I personally think you made the right one.

loxpoxmox −  NTA – I love the swift action to protect your sister’s moment. Well played!!

Whycantooooo −  NTA He was trying to upstage your sister on her wedding day, and she made it clear she didn’t want anyone overshadowing/usstaging her on her special day.

myxgreasyxflannel −  NTA. Your cousin knew what he was doing and you did what you had to to make sure that you kept your promise to your sister.

[Reddit User] −  You are a saint! What a clutch move, “Someone is about to propose mid ceremony? NOT ON MY WATCH!” Obviously NTA

[Reddit User] −  NTA and you’re the real MVP for blocking his attempt at sabotaging their wedding. He sounds like a tool.