AITA for asking my sister to cancel her plans to watch her own daughter after I agreed to babysit this Sunday?

A woman has been the primary source of support, both financially and emotionally, for her younger sister ever since she became a single parent at the age of 20. She initially accepted her sister’s request to watch her child this Sunday so she could attend a party. However, after being invited to a crucial work dinner, she requested that her sister change her arrangements.

The sister responded with ire, charging her with a lack of consideration and a failure to grasp the difficulties faced by mothers of young children. The woman believes she is within her rights to value her career advancement over the commitment to babysit. Read the original story below…

‘ AITA for asking my sister to cancel her plans to watch her own daughter after I agreed to babysit this Sunday?’

I (30F) have been my younger sister Cathy’s (23F) mainstay, offering monetary and moral assistance from the moment she became pregnant at 20. After the child’s father exited the scene, unprepared for parenthood, I took it upon myself to assist with every aspect of her life, from her education and housing to the needs of her now 3-year-old child.

Cathy is currently enrolled in university and achieving good grades. However, she frequently goes out on weekends to experience the social life she previously lacked. Recently, Cathy requested that I look after her daughter next Sunday because one of her fellow students is hosting a get-together at their house.

Since I was free and aware of how precious her limited leisure time is, I accepted. Considering the sacrifices she made as a young mother, I’ve consistently aimed to show compassion.

Yesterday, my supervisor contacted me via email to inform me of a team dinner planned for this Sunday with senior executives; it appears it may be to celebrate my potential promotion. I’ve dedicated myself to this job, and the chance to network with those in leadership could significantly benefit my career.

I told Cathy about the change in my plans and asked if she could stay home with her daughter instead, explaining how important this dinner is for my future.
Cathy completely flipped. She told me I was being unfair because I had *already agreed* to babysit and she was really looking forward to going out.

She mentioned that opportunities to unwind are scarce for her, and she’s entitled to enjoyment like anybody else. I understand she is young, has experienced hardship and doesn’t often socialize. However, I also believe I have provided ample assistance to her and her child in recent years. My role transcends that of a sister; I essentially serve as her economic support system.

She called me selfish for attempting to withdraw at the last moment, claiming I prioritize only myself and my professional life. I responded that, although I desire to assist, this represents a significant chance for me, and I cannot consistently prioritize her requirements above my own.

It was also made clear that the child in question is *her* responsibility, not mine, and it’s perfectly reasonable to expect her to skip a single social event to look after her own daughter. Now, Cathy is acting distant, claiming that I don’t appreciate the challenges she faces as a young mother and that I’m prioritizing my career over her well-being.

Am I the bad guy for requesting she change her schedule so I can attend my company dinner this Sunday? Or is she acting unreasonably by assuming I will once again prioritize her needs above my own?

Take a look at the comments from fellow users:

Sassy-Peanut −  Cathy is a spoiled b**t – and if she feels your career is less important that her night out with friends, she cannot expect your financial support to continue either. Let her find out what being a single Mum is really like without you as her cushion.

Level-Tangerine-8172 −  that I only care about myself and my career. Would the be the very same career that allows you to financially support her? She is being very e**itled and ungrateful.

As a young, unmarried mother, she undoubtedly faces challenges. However, she ultimately chose this path and must accept the consequences. It seems you provide her with extensive assistance. Prioritizing a dinner that could significantly impact your career is far more important than attending a casual gathering. You are not the asshole.

IllustriousEnd2055 −  but she parties a lot on weekends, trying to live the life she missed out on. she’s been through a lot, and she doesn’t get out much.. INFO: Which is it?

Shadow4summer −  NTA. My God, could she possibly wring any more out of you? Tell her you will not be babysitting that weekend or anytime in the near future. Until she can show a little gratitude she can f**k off. Why should you sacrifice so she can party?

Let your folks know how grateful you are that they’re prepared to take over because you’re finished with this!

Cultjamm23 −  You aren’t helping. You are enabling. Stop it. 

Madmattylock −  NTA, but you created this monster by not letting her feel the reality of the position she’s in.

brenda_meevazquez −  NTA. Given how long you’ve been providing for your sister and her daughter, it makes sense that you would want to put your professional development first.

It’s unfair for her to assume you’ll always halt your own life for her. You’ve earned this opportunity. It might be beneficial for her to become more independent in raising her child instead of consistently relying on you.

AutumnLaughter −  You know I read Reddit too much when I already know your sister is going to bail on Sunday regardless and leave you watching the kid.
Please have a plan if she does this. NTA.

BlindUmpBob −  This nay seem like a silly question, but how much did you enjoy the s** Cathy had when she got pregnant? Oh, you weren’t there? Then why would the result of that encounter be your responsibility.

She intentionally became pregnant, seemingly with a man who doesn’t want to be a father, and then complains about being a single mother. It’s a shame that the process of conception remains a mystery to some.

Was she out of line to request her sister remain at home? Or is her sister acting like she deserves special treatment? What are your opinions? Express your thoughts in the section below!