AITA for asking for the dog to be put in another room after being jumped on?

A Reddit user recounted going to a get-together at someone they knew, where they were surprised by a big German shepherd that jumped on them right when they walked in. Taken aback and disliking dogs jumping on them, they pushed the dog aside and inquired whether it could be moved to a different area.

The homeowner declined, asserting the residence was equally the dog’s. Annoyed, the individual chose to depart from the gathering, resulting in negative reactions from the homeowner and fellow guests. The individual is now questioning their own judgment in the matter. The complete account is available below.

‘ AITA for asking for the dog to be put in another room after being jumped on?’

This last weekend, my wife and I attended a party at the home of someone I know peripherally—a friend of a friend I’ve encountered on a few occasions. Although I received an invitation, I wouldn’t consider myself well-acquainted with them.

Upon entering, I was unexpectedly greeted by their German Shepherd, which I was unaware they owned. The dog emerged suddenly and leaped onto me, placing its paws on my chest. I pushed the dog away and angrily told it to go away. The host immediately scolded me for being disrespectful to their dog.

I experienced a situation where their dog leaped onto me, which I found undesirable. I expressed my preference for the dog to be placed in a separate area to prevent a recurrence. However, the host firmly declined, asserting the dog’s right to be there as well. Consequently, I informed my wife of our departure, bid farewell to the other guests, and promptly left the party.

My phone has been constantly buzzing with messages from several individuals, and the host contacted me to express their disapproval of my behavior towards their dog. It’s astonishing to me that I’m still receiving feedback about this incident four days later. Am I the one in the wrong?

Here’s the comments of Reddit users:

micknick0000 −  At the end of the day, the dog shouldn’t have jumped on you. But a dog hopping up to basically greet someone as they walk into the house… is it reaaaaaaaaaally the worst thing in the world?

It’s not the dog’s responsibility. Clearly, the owners are enabling this behavior. You may not be entirely at fault in this instance, but based on your account of your reaction, how you spoke to the host and then your wife, and the overall impression your post creates, I’m fairly certain you are at fault.

BeeYehWoo −  I would be APPALLED and apologetic if my dog did that. We train her to NOT jump on strangers. Not everyone likes having dog paws on their person and for good reason.

The party organizer is sound asleep. Not everyone adores your canine companion as much as the host does. She’s a terrible host with awful etiquette, yet expects you to put up with it. To make matters worse, rather than apologizing, she attempted to scold you. She can rot in hell. You’re not the bad guy.

ThePhilV −  Probably an unpopular opinion, but absolutely NTA. I have extreme discomfort around dogs, for a variety of reasons. People who expect others to just deal with their dog’s lack of training, especially when it’s a larger breed, are a huge red flag to me.

Dogs have a natural inclination to invade personal boundaries, which is something I find unbearable. When they do this, their constant fidgeting, wriggling, and nudging becomes overwhelming. This unpredictability and excessive stimulation forces me to retreat.

Your reaction was spontaneous and almost automatic, so I don’t believe you are to blame for your surprise at being unexpectedly accosted the instant the door was opened.

kem81 −  ESH /YTA. The owner is right that its the dogs house too and they shouldn’t have to shove the dog into a room because 1 person has a problem with the dog. You have every right to exclaim in surprise, even with swear words, that you have been jumped on by a dog you don’t know if they are going to be friendly with your or not.

Your behavior was terrible when you informed your wife “we’re leaving” and pulled her from the celebration after they refused to confine the dog. You didn’t get what you wanted, so you left in a huff, which was immature and nasty.

“Depending on the situation, here are some alternative ways to phrase it: ‘Hey, I wasn’t aware you had a dog, and they make me quite anxious. I’ll have to leave if you’re going to keep him out here. Sorry about that.’ Or, ‘I apologize, but I have a severe dog allergy, and I wasn’t informed that you had one.'”

Any number of alternative answers would have been better than sounding like you were attempting to instruct a complete stranger on how to manage their dog in their own home.

No-Entertainment3435 −  ESH. The owners should train the dog not to jump, and have better control of it when new people are coming into the home if they know it’s easily excitable. However. You walked into the home of someone who you don’t know well, immediately started screaming curse words.

I’d wager you were more forceful with the dog than you’re letting on. You instructed someone you barely know on how to handle their dog in their own house. Then, you ordered your wife around and created a dramatic exit. Most dogs, around 90%, are initially enthusiastic when meeting someone new and might be briefly overexcited, but they usually settle down and relax after a minute or so.

It was a gross overstatement and downright impolite. Should you genuinely be so averse to canines, you could have articulated your concerns respectfully to the dog’s caretaker.

loseit_throwit −  Honestly NTA. I have a much smaller dog than a German Shepherd but some would say that he’s intimidating (he’s a pittie mix). He’s super friendly, but can get too excited when new people come into the house and sometimes does try to jump up. We have a whole training routine at the door when he’s meeting new people.

He retreats to his crate to prevent excessive excitement when someone knocks, and to avoid bolting out the door or enthusiastically jumping on visitors. We then assess if he’s composed enough to sit, lie down, and accept treats and gentle affection from guests.

If he disobeys a single order, he’s confined back to his crate to calm down until he can comfortably interact with our visitors without being overly friendly. When hosting larger gatherings, we keep the dog crated until all guests have arrived and repeat the process for any guests who arrive late.

It’s understandable to react defensively, even aggressively, towards a big, unfamiliar dog suddenly appearing at the entrance. Your friends are also at fault for not keeping their dog safely contained near the doorway; imagine the danger if the dog had escaped outside. Naturally, the house belongs to the dog as well.

but it’s about ensuring the dog is trained and has a comforting, calming routine when new people are entering the house. Your friends are being really irresponsible with their animal and I sincerely hope it doesn’t end badly for the dog.

EDIT: Some responses here express complete confidence that owning a big dog without training it not to jump poses no risk. They also suggest it’s possible to have a dog that jumps on people at the door but is perfectly trained not to run out. Or that inadequate training won’t have negative effects on the dog if someone gets hurt. I’m not sure what these people are thinking, and I hope they don’t have dogs.

accio_depressioso −  ESH. Dogs should not be jumping on guests. That’s poor training and negligence on the part of the owner. They s**k for this. You’re an adult. It sounds like you had an angry, volatile reaction to a dog jumping on you. You literally said “f**k off”, words typically spoken in a manner that makes everyone around uncomfortable. Learn to be calm and use your big-boy words.

Epsilon_and_Delta −  I’m going with YTA. Should the dog have jumped on you? No. Should the owner have been apologetic for that? Yes. But you escalated the situation needlessly. First you told the dog to f**k off which was wholly unnecessary, which obviously got the owner’s back up. Anyone who talks to someone’s pet or kid like that should expect the other person to immediately get defensive.

You then made things worse by insisting the dog be confined. Why not wait and see if the dog continued to bother you? Perhaps it simply jumped to welcome you and would have left you alone afterwards. But no, you immediately made demands of the owner instead of just calmly and politely saying “sorry for my language.”

That dog gave me a fright, and I’m not keen on dogs leaping on me. Could you ensure it doesn’t happen again? Your departure marked the third escalation. Was your assessment correct that a well-mannered dog shouldn’t jump on people and owners should acknowledge that not everyone is a dog lover (and even those who are don’t appreciate being jumped on)? Definitely.

That doesn’t excuse your behavior. You may be correct, but the reason you’re getting so many calls is because you behaved terribly.

prevknamy −  NTA!! Society needs to make dog owners understand that their little precious angels should not be jumping on people. Ever. It’s scary. It’s gross. It creates social tension because your only option is to push it off somewhat aggressively then the owners get pissy. If owners can’t keep their dog under control then the thing shouldn’t be around people

antizana −  NTA. Your response was off the cuff startled from someone not expecting to be literally face to face with a large animal. Telling it to F off may have offended the owners but it’s not like the dog can tell or care. I don’t fault you for asking the dog to be kept elsewhere- yes it’s the dog’s home too but the owners won’t bother to train it so the chances of having another poor encounter are 0.

Can’t stand people who don’t train their dogs, especially big and intelligent breeds like German shepherds. I love dogs, but there’s no justification for that. Training is a fundamental aspect of dog ownership. Furthermore, a thoughtful host would feel embarrassed and contrite if a guest felt uncomfortable in their home.

Is it acceptable for visitors to request that animals be confined to a different space when they come over, or should they be okay with how the animals act in their environment? What would be your course of action in a comparable instance? Let us know what you think!