AITAH for refusing to lend my coworker my car after she called me irresponsible for driving it?

A Reddit user recounts how his prized possession, a vibrant orange Honda Civic, ignited a dispute at his job. A colleague, having previously derided his car as “irresponsible,” subsequently requested to use it during an emergency. The user declined, referencing her previous statements. He is now facing repercussions at work and questioning whether his response was excessive.

‘ AITAH for refusing to lend my coworker my car after she called me irresponsible for driving it?’

I’m a 28-year-old male employed in a medium-sized office, and my car tends to stand out. It’s a vibrant orange, two-decade-old Honda Civic, which I’ve diligently restored over time. It’s noisy and aged, but mechanically sound, and I’m proud of it. My colleagues frequently tease me about it, referring to it as a “go-kart” or a “clown car.” I usually just laugh it off, because, truthfully, I adore my car.

Lately, a colleague of mine, *Sarah* (35F), has been especially outspoken on the matter. Just last week, in the break room, she remarked with a sneer: *“I’m shocked you would drive something like that. It’s incredibly reckless. What happens if it malfunctions and leads to a crash?”* I responded with a dismissive eye roll, stating that my car is in excellent working order.

Yesterday, Sarah hurried over to my workspace, clearly anxious. Her car had stopped working, and she required transportation to collect her children from school. She inquired if she could use my vehicle for a short period that afternoon, assuring me it would only be for a few hours.

I was taken aback. I brought up her previous remark about my supposed lack of responsibility and stated, “If I don’t feel secure driving my own vehicle, I certainly wouldn’t want you or your children to be in it.” She appeared ashamed and claimed her words weren’t intended as they came across, but I maintained my refusal. I generally avoid lending my car to anyone, particularly after her persistent criticisms.

She had to beg a colleague for transportation, and now she’s ignoring me and calling me “vindictive” to other people because I’m supposedly holding a grudge. Several of my colleagues believe I should have disregarded the past and assisted her, while others believe she deserved it. Now I’m questioning whether I was excessively severe. Should I have disregarded everything and let her use the car? Am I the bad guy?

Take a look at the comments from fellow users:

BulbasaurRanch −  Sounds like her giving you the cold shoulder is perfectly welcome. Doesn’t seem like the type that having a relationship is worth the effort.. Trash takes out itself sometimes.

Independentvoter40 −  NTA – Who lets someone drive their car at work. With liability issues out there, no way. EDIT\* If they got in a wreck you’d be on the hook!

judgingA-holes −  NTA – See I’m so petty that ever time I would see her I would start asking has she gotten a new car yet because clearly it’s irresponsible of her to drive a car that breaks down all the time, and tell her that maybe she needs to get an old civic like you because you don’t have that problem. But I mean, that’s just my petty ass.

Maximal_gain −  NTA your car, your choice. my insurance won’t cover another person driving it period. Unless they are on my insurance.

sttaydown −  NTA and any coworker who believes you are could have just as easily leant their car instead and see how that plays out.

MsChrisRI −  “I’m not holding a grudge. Sarah’s always calling my old car an accident risk. What if it broke down with her children in it?”

StyleBeneficial3008 −  F**k that! You’re NTA. Let me talk s**t about you all the time, but now I need you to let me use your car… get the f**k out of here with that bs! Good riddance you don’t need her bitchy ass around you anyway.

Js987 −  “Some of my coworkers are saying I should’ve just let it go and helped her out, but others think she had it coming.” Sure looks like another AI generated story. But if it’s not, never lend your vehicle.

-KristalG- −  NTA. Tell others how funny her face was, when you rejected her request. Since she gonna talk s**t to your colleagues about you, two can play this game.

Clean_Factor9673 −  NTA. Co-worker has no entitlement to use your car.

Was the user right to decline lending his car, or should he have disregarded prior remarks and offered assistance during a difficult time? In a similar situation, how would you respond to a request from someone who has previously criticized you? Post your opinions!