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AITA for telling my coworker her perfume triggers my migraines and that I’ll work from home every day she wears it?

Welcome back, dear readers, to another perplexing workplace dilemma on 'Am I The Asshole'! Today, we're diving into the thorny world of office etiquette, personal health, and the delicate balance required when individual comfort clashes with another's daily habits. It's a tale that many of us can relate to, whether we're the one suffering or unknowingly causing discomfort.

Our protagonist, suffering from debilitating migraines, finds herself in a difficult situation with a coworker's seemingly innocuous choice of perfume. The question isn't just about scent, but about boundaries, communication, and the lengths one should go to protect their well-being. Was our OP justified in their direct approach, or did they overstep?

AITA for telling my coworker her perfume triggers my migraines and that I’ll work from home every day she wears it?

"AITA for telling my coworker her perfume triggers my migraines and that I’ll work from home every day she wears it?"

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This scenario presents a classic clash between individual rights and communal responsibility in a shared workspace. On one hand, Chloe has the right to express herself and wear her chosen perfume. It's a personal grooming choice that, in most contexts, wouldn't be an issue. However, the 'most contexts' caveat is critical here, as an office environment demands consideration for colleagues' well-being and productivity.

From OP's perspective, chronic migraines are not a minor inconvenience; they are a debilitating medical condition. The ability to work and function effectively is severely compromised by triggers. OP’s attempts at subtle communication went unnoticed or unacknowledged, leading to an escalation of her suffering. Her health and ability to perform her job are paramount, and she reached a breaking point.

The way OP communicated her boundary is where the discussion becomes nuanced. While directness was necessary after subtle hints failed, the 'ultimatum' aspect of working from home might be perceived as aggressive or uncollaborative by Chloe and other colleagues. It shifted the burden entirely onto Chloe and potentially created an uncomfortable dynamic in the office, even if OP felt justified.

Ultimately, workplaces often have policies, explicit or implicit, about strong scents precisely for these reasons. It's not about stifling personal expression but ensuring an accessible and healthy environment for everyone. The company's role here is crucial; they should ideally facilitate a resolution that respects both parties while prioritizing employee health and a productive work environment.

The Scent of Controversy: What the Internet Had to Say!

The comments section for this story was, as expected, a lively debate! Many users immediately sided with OP, highlighting the severe impact of migraines and the necessity of advocating for one's health. They emphasized that a workplace is not a personal vanity space and accommodations for medical conditions should always take precedence over cosmetic choices, especially after gentle attempts at communication failed.

However, a significant number also pointed out that while OP's feelings were valid, her delivery could have been handled with more finesse. Some felt the 'ultimatum' was overly confrontational and could have been phrased as a request for HR intervention or a direct conversation with the manager first. This led to a discussion about whether the employer bears primary responsibility for implementing a scent-free policy.

Comentariu de la MigraineWarrior

Comentariu de la OfficeEtiquettePro

Comentariu de la ScentSensitiveGuy

Comentariu de la ChloeFan

Comentariu de la HRHopes


This story highlights the perennial challenge of balancing individual freedoms with collective well-being in a shared space. While OP's method was direct, the underlying issue of debilitating migraines caused by a coworker's perfume is undeniable. It's a powerful reminder for workplaces to consider comprehensive scent policies and for individuals to practice empathy and awareness. Ultimately, a healthy and productive environment benefits everyone, and sometimes, uncomfortable conversations are necessary to achieve it. The goal should always be respectful resolution, ideally with management support.

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