AITA for refusing to let my sister-in-law be godmother because she’s unreliable?

Choosing godparents for your child is a significant decision, steeped in tradition and personal expectation. It's not just about bestowing an honor; it's about selecting individuals who will genuinely support your child's spiritual, and often practical, upbringing. Families often have strong opinions, leading to a minefield of potential disagreements, especially when reliability comes into question.
Today's AITA story perfectly encapsulates this dilemma. Our poster, a new parent, is facing pushback from her husband after she refused to name his sister as godmother due to a long history of unreliability. This isn't just about hurt feelings; it's about a parent's desire to secure the best possible support system for their child. Let's dive into the story and see where the community lands.

"AITA for refusing to let my sister-in-law be godmother because she’s unreliable?"




The role of a godparent is multifaceted, often encompassing spiritual guidance, emotional support, and even a potential guardianship role in some traditions. Therefore, the decision isn't merely about who you like, but who you trust to uphold these significant responsibilities. Our poster's concerns about her sister-in-law's unreliability are entirely valid, especially when considering the long-term impact on her child's life and potential support system.
The husband, Mark, appears to be viewing the godparent role primarily as a family honor, perhaps underestimating the weight of its actual duties. His desire to avoid family conflict is understandable, but it shouldn't overshadow the primary goal: selecting the best possible guardians for Lily. Suggesting that the role itself will 'make' his sister more responsible is a hopeful, but often unrealistic, expectation.
From Sarah's perspective, being overlooked might feel like a personal slight, regardless of her past behavior. It's a tricky situation where intention and perception can diverge significantly. While her unreliability might be a genuine issue, the perceived rejection could sting. The family dynamic, particularly the potential for a 'rift,' adds another layer of complexity to an already emotionally charged decision.
Ultimately, the parents must make this decision together, prioritizing their child's welfare above all else. Communication, empathy, and a clear understanding of the godparent's responsibilities are crucial. While family harmony is important, it cannot come at the expense of ensuring a reliable and supportive network for their daughter. Finding a way to explain this to Mark, without resorting to blaming, will be key.
The Verdict is In: Community Weighs in on Godparent Drama!
The comments section for this story was, as expected, a lively debate. The overwhelming sentiment leaned towards NTA, with many users empathizing with the poster's desire for a reliable godparent. Many shared their own experiences of choosing non-family members or dealing with the fallout of picking an unsuitable one, reinforcing the idea that this isn't just a ceremonial title but a serious responsibility.
However, some commenters offered a different perspective, suggesting a softer approach or even a conversation with Sarah directly. While understanding the husband's desire to include family, the consensus remained that the child's needs and the godparent's ability to fulfill their role should take precedence over perceived family 'honors' or avoiding temporary discomfort.





This AITA story serves as a powerful reminder that while family is important, the decisions we make for our children must always put their well-being first. The role of a godparent, whether viewed religiously or secularly, carries a significant weight of responsibility. Our poster's desire for reliability is not only justified but commendable. It's a conversation many families face, highlighting the tension between tradition, familial expectations, and practical considerations. Hopefully, our poster and her husband can find a resolution that honors their daughter's future above all else.